First, be sure to read the disclaimer. Now that we've gotten rid of THEM, pet your eyebrows and "rowwwll" like a cat. Very good. On to step two.

Read and study The Bible of Conanism, and the Doctrine. Learn The Way and the Conanments. Learn to properly exemplify the standards of Conanism in public. When you feel ready, continue to step three.

Please preform 45 seconds of Community Service for The Church of Conan. Email Sysop@towne.net and/or Leann@twne.com with the message, "where is the church of conan?" or "what happened to http://www.twne.com/spam?" If you can think of a better message than that, you earn 2 extra points. If they answer, do not reply. Your deed has been done. The reason for this is because they spitefully removed my pages from their server before I had a chance to finish moving them, and I would like to harmlessly annoy them. Thank you. Move on to step five.

This is the final step. You must send email to conanism@gigglebounce.com. It is an "email robot" and will automatically respond with a "Confirmation" within a minute or so. Yes, that's right. No more waiting days and days for a human confirmation. Your email address will not be harvested and sold to any companies, and you will not get any more emails after that. It is quite simple. Happy Conanism!